Words

The words you use
the words you hide
They tell a tale of high & might.

The words you hide
the words you use
They tell the tale of the abuse.

The words you learn
Those you forget
They tell the tale of your regret.

The ones forgotten
Than relearned
They do speak volumes of your yearns

The words you got
The words you left
The story shows how much they meant

The words you left
The new you got
Can't be no else by real growth.

The words I sent
This message with
They wanted out. Wanted to breath.

Go find YOUR words
Now if you please.
Let them tell you the things you miss.

Writing

Writing,
is a way to wash the soul
Clean away the grit,
and bare it all.
Waiting for a new or higher call
....
To take its toll.

Spread

When you are all out
When you're spread thin
Like morning dew frozen within
Sun melts away your cover skin

Rebound
Regain
Rewin

A droplet centered
Outside in.

In short

It's only funny if it makes you laugh
It's only happy if it makes you happy
It's only...
If it scares away the lonely

Breath

Breathing is important
Under water
It holds you
It floats you
It drowns you
And you don't even remember...

While You wait

The ices melt
While you wait
Pure love turns to hate
While you wait
Winter's back at the gate
While you wait

Get up
Get up mate!

Playing with words

Think big,

Think small,

Don't think at all!
...
What a docile doll?!

If you could see

If YOU could see YOU
...with my eyes
The sparkle, drive without disguise,
The will within, mature and rise
You'd never doubt your godly size!

If I could see me
... with your eyes,
No doubts,  just love that all surmise.
.....

If we could see US with OUR eyes...
Forever more in the sunrise.

I should

I should feel immortal
But I feel trapped.
Layer upon layer
of resentment and hate

Perla muzikore në shqipërim të lirë: Mos bë asnjë pyetje

Teksti me poshtë është shqipërim i "Ask Me No Questions" të Wendy Mcneill për të cilën kam folur dhe më parë. Teksti orgjinal në anglisht më poshtë vjen nga Songmeanings
Kënga mund të shijohet ketu

MOS BË ASNJË PYETJE

Unë hyra në kopësht dhe e di se çfarë pash'?
Gjak t'freskët mbi pupla dhe dhelpërushin plak
Që qeshur e çirur më pa drejt në sy
Tha mos bëj asnjë pyetje s'të rrej asnjë fij'.

Nga erdhe poftise? Sa gjatë do të rrish?
Si mace kurioze me pyetje zur' pritë
Kish shumë për të thënë kjo dihej vetdish.
Më tha nga parajsa po dhe nga vetë
Ferri vij.

Dekada të tëra kam gjuajtur shumë
Po rri incognito e ndërroj shpesh formë
Njëherë vij njeri i njohur i ditur
Njëherë vij si fjalë natës pëshpëritur

'Them e sheh nuk flitet për shpresë, mos u bë naive kërko të vërtetë
Me mua kërce të t'jap siguri të t'jap ç'të duash, edhe lumturi

Ktheva majat nga thundrat dhe vrapit ja dhashë 
Pas meje shpejt rendi zemra duke i rrahë
U ktheva ta shihja po qiellit humbi
Një dyzinë korbash e qanin sa mundnin

Thanë "mos bë asnjë py'tje, s'të rren asnjë fij' "
Thanë " mos bë asnjë py'tje, s'të rren asnjë fij' "

______
Original lyrics Ask Me No Questions
i walked in the garden and what did i see?
fresh blood on some feathers and an old coyote
smiling and growling, looked straight in my eyes
said 'ask me no questions, i'll tell you no lies'

where did you come from? how long will you stay?
like a curious cat, i kept firing away
he had a great story , that much i could tell
he said, 'i am from heaven and i am from hell'

'for decades and decades i've hunted and roamed
but i go incognito no shape of my own
sometimes i am human and rather well known
sometimes i' m the whisper on your nights alone'

'i'll say,
can you see, it's not about hope, it's not about truth, don't be naive
so come dance with me, i'll keep you safe-give you all you can take-
i'll make you happy'

i spun on my heal and i ran toward the street
he was so close behind me i could hear his heart beat
i turned round to face him but he took to the sky
and a dozen old blackbirds started to cry
they said, 'ask him no questions, he'll tell you no lies'
they said, 'ask him no questions , he'll tell you no lies

Perla poetike në shqipërim të lirë

Faleminderit për frymëzimin @AlidaJolie.

Më poshtë versioni im i "Mad girls love song" të Sylvia Plath. Si gjithmonë ka SHUMË vend për përmirësim por zotimi u mbajt. Personalisht jam ende e pakënaqur me strofen e tretë.  U përpoqa të ruaj rimën orgjinale dhe siç e dinë të gjithë ata që shqipërojnë  balanca midis korrektësisë se formës dhe asaj të  përmbajtjes është akt ekuilbrizmi i vështirë.
Shijim të mbarë. :)

Këngë dashurie e vajzës së çmendur

I mbyll unë sytë dhe gjithë bota vdes
I ngre qepallat dhe e gjitha sërish lind.
(Më duket e mendjes sime je sajesë )

Tej dalin yjet, n'valle t'kuq e blus',
E errësira arbitrare vendin merr n'galop
I mbyll unë sytë dhe bota bie, vdes.

Një ëndërr ndolli të të vij nën shtresë
Dhe hënës marranike mendtë t'mi këndoje
M'puthe sa marrinë n'vete zgjova
(Më duket e mendjes sime je sajesë)

Zoti rrokopullet që nga qiejt
Zjarr i ferrit meket:
Drejt daljes rendin ëngjëj e njer'z t'djallit
I mbyll unë sytë dhe gjithë bota fiket.

Dëshirë kam të kthehesh siç the t'pres
Por pleqëria vjen e fshin kujtesën.
(Më duket e mendjes sime je sajesë)

Më mirë të kisha dashur zog t' rrufesë
Të paktën në pranverë do gjegjet besë
Unë i mbyll sytë dhe gjithë bota bie, vdes.
(Më duket e mendjes sime je sajesë.)

Mad Girl's Love Song (original)

I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck,
kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky,
hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

Perla poetike (ne shqiperim te lire)

[e bart zemren tende me vete (e bart ne te)] e.e. cummings

E bart zemren tende me vete (e bart brenda

ne zemren time) nuk jam kurre pa te (kudo

shkoj ti je me mua zemer dhe gjithcka bej

behet dhe nga ti shpirt)

Nuk i trembem

asnje fati (se ti je fati im i embel) nuk dua

asnje bote (se e bukur ti je bota ime, e vertete)

dhe je ti gjithecka nenkuptoi nje hene

dhe gjithcka dielli ngahere kendoi je ti

ketu qendron sekreti me i thelle qe askush s’e di

(ketu eshte rrenja e renjes dhe gonxhja e gonxhes

dhe qielli i qiellit i pemes se quajtur jete qe rritet

me lart sec shpreson shpirti e sec mund te fshehe mendja

dhe kjo eshte mrekullia qe vec e larg i mban yjet

e bart zemren tende me vete (e bart ne zemren time e bart)

 

[i carry your heart with me (i carry it in)] e.e. cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

 

 

 

Dikur zhgarravisja edhe anglisht...(4)

Jeta (15 maj 1995)
Jeta është një batica
Unë, grimcë rëre jam
Në bregdetin e lagur prej saj

Jeta është një shilarës
Unë, unaza e fundit pa peshë ku luhatet ajo.

Baticë - zbaticë
Ngritje - rënie
O zot mos ma shkurto jetën
Mos më jep dhembje

Life (english version around winter 2001)
Life is a tide
Me, a grain of sand
Off the seashore it wets.

Life is a sea saw
Me, the last weightless ring
Where it hangs.

Forwards and backwards
Upwards and downwards
Don't  shorten my life, god.
Don't give me hurts

Dikur zhgarravisja edhe anglisht. ... (3)

The return of a spirit (6 maj 1996)
Hold me tight till the morning comes
Hold me don't let me go
Let regrets fly through the endless sky
Away bitterness throw

If morning comes and finds me still
In your bed sleeping  (or more)
I'll never again need be sincere
With God or man or soul

If the last minutes spent with you
Will end as they begun
Remember as the last kiss'll happen
And there will be no more fun

So hold me tight now and forever
I'll never try to leave
A bit of life prepared in heaven
I'm stealing being a thieve

I stole a life, your heart and soul
Became human again
I know the love I spent around
Was not wasted in vain.

Dikur zhgarravisja anglisht... (2)

Malli (ripunuar diku midis 1998-1999)
Më mori malli
Malli për ty dhe për vete
U sëmura
Me dhimbje shpirti

Sy të çakërdisur
Flokë të shpupurisur

Marrëzi ! - Malli im për ty.

Missed 
I've missed you
I've missed you and me
I've been sick
Of soul aches

Wide open eyes
Fuzzy ruffled hair
Cross shattered heart
Thoroughly lost mind

Crazingly ! - Missing you and me.

Dikur zhgarravisja ...anglisht (1)

Mirror   (qershor 1999)

Hand in hand
Lip on lip
Eye to eye

One icy cold
One burning hot

Just close the eyes
And it's not glass
Try catch your breath
Don't let it pass

My hand in your hand
My lips on your lips
My breath,your breath
Two heartbeats and Love

Until...
The cold is no more cold
And the mirror not mirroring
And there is no need to wait until tomorrow.

Be wise

Be wise
my heart
be steady

for the time is in
and you're ready

Be wise
my love
Be smart
Be what you are
Art

I know

I don't know what makes me happy
as odd as it sounds.
I don't feel I know
what makes me tick right now.

I'm not sure I can ask it of you
To help me grow
As you're stuck in your own
Status quo

I know
Today the paths depart
And some day maybe
You'll grow a stronger heart
One that could bear the thought
Of time apart
One that could even cherish
A brand new start

Ps: As they say in Sweden hjärta-smärta (heart-pain) rhimes appeal to people. I'd actually say heart-fart rhimes appeal to people.

Muzike e paharruar

Kjo kenge qe shenoi debutin e Shqiperise ne Eurovizion tingellon akoma me e bukur kur krahasohet me pasardheset. Versioni shqip eshte shume me i fuqishem edhe pse versioni ne anglisht nuk bie poshte.

Expectations

Languages are a complicated thing. It's like they are sufficient each one in itself but than...once you've learned and used another one you find them inssuficient. You can express everything in one language but once you've taken the leap into a second or third you find some things can't be quite put in the right wording.
And you long to have someone who's taken the same leap as you have. Who can connect and understand your references who can see what meaning is lacking in a word.

Unfortunately even though you may make the transition together your feeling of another language will never be the same as someone else's. Because, and I think this is important, languages are like seeing. Like seeing color for instance. The depth (intensity) of the color is individual. Green is what I see. My green is not necessarily yours. My words are not necessarily the ones you'd use.
Anyhow taking the leap into another language means the old references in the "old" language shift also. And the problem reiterates itself once again.

I remember the fuss we made once about the word awkward. We were three of us in the famous expository writing course. We were gladly using, and abusing, the word until one of us half-jokingly asked: " what does awkward really mean?" and we were lost. There was not one "good" translation in our other tongue. And we started laughing like morones because somehow we knew. We were aware of the meaning and we had taken the same leap but my awkward was not the same as my friends. Awkward moment nonetheless :)

Now to the point. Why ramble about languages today. Because I promised myself I'd keep this blog a live this autumn. I kinda need to. As a breathing hole. As a point of reference in a shaky hopefully productive but whichever way you cut it extremely intense season. An autumn full of expectations for which in at least one of the languages I know there's not a proper word. Not one that covers my depth of meaning for it anyhows.